How to Get My Teen to Talk - The Late Night Visit
Jun 13, 2022WATCH ON YouTube
Sometimes the best way to get your teenager to open up is to enter their world. Here is one creative way to accomplish this:
In this example, let's assume you have a teenage boy who likes to play video games.
Teenagers are more likely to open up and talk late at night; so, here is what you do. Go to bed at your regular time next Friday or Saturday night, but set an alarm for 12:30 am. When the alarm goes off, make your way downstairs. With this example, your teenager will more than likely still be up and playing his or her video games. Make your way into the family room and say something like: “I can’t sleep. Who’s winning?”
After asking this question, stay quiet; just sit and watch.
If after five minutes they haven’t said anything, say, “I am going to make a snack. Do you want anything?”
Sit back down with your snack and continue watching. After a few more minutes, ask a curiosity question like: “This looks really hard. How did you learn to play so well?”
If they engage, just listen and ask clarifying questions. If they don’t engage, watch for a few more minutes then announce that you are going to bed.
Keep in mind that even if your teenager doesn’t open up during this attempt, you have demonstrated a willingness to enter their world without passing judgment and with a genuine interest in what is important to them.
Here is the question for you:
How could you create some opportunities to engage with your teenager in their world?
Jim White
Family Enrichment Coach